Josh Cain '26
It was getting dark outside. The thick southern heat and beam of the sun started to diminish, but the evening orange highlights were still present. This strange but great time of the day is the best. A relaxing breeze flows through my hair, and I know the daily unpaid pain and struggle I and all my African people go through will be over quite soon. You know, this is bad to say, but I’ve developed an anxiously good tolerance for my repetitive days. Is it weird I got used to it? But, mama still hasn’t come back outside from the big house. She got called in a little bit ago by Big John, but nobody knew why. It was very weird. What could they be talking about? Is it good? Is it bad?
I hope Mama’s ok. I know she is, Mama is strong. So am I, and Papa, and little Joey, and little sissy, and even baby Janeen. That's my family. I don’t care what anyone says, we are the strongest family here. I don’t know why, we just are. I make this dreadful workday a competition, to make it more fun. After I finished the plant I was at, smirking because I did it faster than one of the other 14-year-olds, I saw Mama walking back to the field. I really wonder why she was in there for so long. It's practically dark now.
When Mama reaches us back in the field, my mind floods with questions to ask her. Good questions, bad questions, long questions, short questions. But before I could get one out, she shushed me and hugged me.
“But?” I squeaked.
“Everything is okay,” said Mama. “Mama is fine. It's time to go to the cabin for bed. “
The cabin isn’t your typical living space. It is filthy. The smell is terrible. Everything in here just has dirt and grass and more dirt. But you know, we’ve sorta learned how to create this little space into a community. We always say, “It could be so much worse”. I sleep on a little blanket and a bunch of raveled grass as a pillow every day. This night was particularly more comfy than the rest, and I’m not sure why. Maybe it was the hug that Mama gave me earlier? As I’m lying on my back thinking about Mama, I hear her talking. And I think she’s talking to papa? I try to hold my breath to hear them better. I hear a faint “I’m pregnant again”. I try not to gasp through their silence as I hear this, but then she says “With triplets”. Each of my inner organs turns into raindrops on a stormy day and falls aimlessly.
How could this be? Triplets? As in, 3? 3 more kids? 3 more siblings? Boy, Girl? I didn’t want any more siblings. Is this Big John’s decision? Is that why she was away for so long? Is Big John hurting Mama?
Questions with the brute of a tsunami stormed through my head. As I kept looking at the ceiling, a brewing hatred toward Big John arose. And for that reason, that same comfort that I had, lying there on my back, turned to laying on a bunch of needles. And it was like this for the next few days.
Time passed, but everything felt repetitive. Wake up in the morning, put some clothes on, and walk out to the fields for work. After a long day, go back to the cabin and go back to sleep. Each day continued as usual. The same sun, boiling our skin like water, beamed down still. The scent of a fiery breeze with pollen was still present. The evening breeze still cooled everybody down. Everything was identical to the days before. The only difference… My mind. I used to try and find little moments of joy in this cursed lifestyle, but now, I feel myself stuck. While everyone else is moving throughout the day regularly, I find everything I do a drag. I cannot get my mind off of my Mama, and how much I hate Big John. Still, everything else around me was normal; That is, until the next day, my life changed forever.
A few months ago, we found out that the Civil War had ended. It filled the plantation with questions. Many were happy at this feat, and many were confused about what this would mean. Luckily, my family could go to Church through Big John, so we learned a lot, including the ending and aftermath of the Civil War. We learned about Abraham Lincoln and the reforms he was trying to make to give us freedom. My family believed in what we learned at Church. And it turns out it was true. When we were released to go back to our bunker for the day, Big John was following the group of slaves. I see him go into another family’s bunker, assuming the worst of him. Then, after a few minutes, he appeared in ours.
He said, “You are free”.
“What do you mean we are free?” Papa responds
“You are free…President Lincoln just passed the 13th Amendment abolishing slavery. The only thing needed is to complete legal documents and then you guys are free” Big John added.
“Thank you, Jesus,” Papa sighed out loud. “Thank you, Lord.”
A sort of sparkling joy filled the cabin after Big John left. I could sense the relief and relaxation in the air. Then John said,” Ya’ll better thank your mama, she set you guys up real nice”. Along with that joyous feel, came confusion. What did Mama do? After Big John left, my mini grudge for him went with him. I didn’t hate him as much. Mama clears her throat and starts to speak:
“We are going to have seven acres when we leave. From you guys”.
More confusion filled the air.
“Big John knew we were getting released soon. So, he met with me originally, to have more of you guys. At first, I thought this was one of his evil plans, but I learned Big John’s true feelings and intentions thereafter. He incentivized me to have more of you guys to gain land when we were free. So since there are four of you guys here now, and three more in my belly, we now own seven acres of land”.
I started observing the reactions and inner thoughts of everyone in the cabin. Papa was quiet. I’m pretty sure he knew about this because he didn’t seem surprised at all. Little Joey seemed like he understood a bit, but didn’t get the whole concept. Little sissy and baby Janeen were lost in thoughts, staring into space. I didn’t expect them to realize anyway. I however was surprised, extremely. My declining hate for Big John ceased, turning into a sort of like. Similarly, my love and admiration for Mama skyrocketed. One thing that all of us noticed about each other was a massive amount of happiness. I wanted to yell in joy, but I knew Mama would tell me to “shush”. Giggling was all I could do. I jumped out of my bed over to Mama and Papa and gave them one big hug. The little ones joined too, as it was one big family hug. One big family moment that will go down as one of our best family moments.
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I grab a white cup, a mug rather. It was medium-sized, just enough for the right amount of drink that’s going to be in it. I poured some tea that Valerie made a few minutes ago. I pour some sugar in it too, to satisfy my sweet tooth that I developed over the years. I look out the Kitchen window and see the sunset I’ve always enjoyed seeing. That mixture of a dimmed sky with a pink and orange splurge of color will never get old. I turn around and see June running around on the porch, light-skinned skin just like Mama. I walk out of the kitchen and through the front door to June sitting on the ground out of breath and Valerie sitting on the rocking chair laughing. It made me giggle a bit. It also made me think about the funny times with Mama and Papa when I was younger. Younger me would have never imagined living in a large beautiful house, with a daughter and an amazing wife, laughing on a porch, on the same land as he grew up. It's mesmerizing to think about. All of a sudden, Valerie says,
“We need to get June a sibling, to grow up and do all sibling things with, you know?”
“I agree, let's see what she thinks”, I respond.
“Hey, June, come here for a second”, Valerie calls out.
June does her 2-year-old shuffle over, trying to balance and not fall. I always get a kick out of that run. She yells, “yhaaaaa hiiiiii”. She really loves the word hi. I guess that's a good thing for the future. Valerie says, “Do you want a brother or sister, honey”?, Repeating it a few times, switching up tempos so that June can understand it clearly. After the last time, June yells, “Nooooooo! No bwaster no sispha ”. Of course, the only clear word was no, which got the message across. She likes that word too. Me and Valerie laugh. As I laugh, I start getting to thinking about myself. About how when I was younger I didn’t want any more siblings. I was mad that Mama was having more kids. Little did I know it was for the best. Thinking about my mom, loving her even more. Without her, none of this would be possible. I love her. My thoughts were interrupted by Valerie saying:
“Well, you don't have a choice missy!”
“Come here June give me a hug!”, I add on.
She runs over and gives me a big hug. A hug from June, that felt like a hug from Mama.
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